A Piece of My Mind ……

…… has been given to that bloody E Harmony site.
And yes, I just used the word bloody. That’s probably because I’ve been watching House Hunter’s International and listening to British and Australian home buyers.
And it seemed to fit.

As I’ve said before, I don’t have a lot of pieces up there left to give, but I truly loathe that site.
I haven’t deleted my account yet because I purchased a 3 month plan, and I’m determined to stick it out until the bitter end.

I mostly just delete men every few days now. That’s because they have never, EVER sent me a good match. Every single one is accompanied with the words, “This match is outside of your settings, but it might work.”
I have no idea why they’ve never, EVER, sent a match within my settings (which are actually quite broad), but last night’s email of “outside matches” was the last straw.

I went on line, pulled up my profile, deleted everything I had written in the “More About Me” section and then wrote this:

A little more about me

I’m getting ready to leave this site because eHarmony has been a negative experience for me. I feel completely invisible on this site. Do you men NEVER make the first move??! What is it that you’re afraid of? I’m fine with men who are “outside” my settings (which are the only kind I get), but I’m not fine with always having to be the one who initiates, who sends the “smile” (gag!). I’ve done it, plenty of times, but haven’t had a man respond. I’m fun, funny, independent, spiritual, healthy and fit, smart and I love adventure. I’d rather be single the rest of my life than stick around here.

Yes, I really wrote that, clicked “save” and then closed up shop.
And guess what happened?
Oh, of course you know what happened because … REALLY?!

So now I’m in communication with a guy who read that within 30 minutes of my edit and then wanted to “get to know me”.
Go figure.

In other non-on-line-dating news, I think barre class almost killed me today. After I came home I was so exhausted that I had to go take a nap. An hour later I didn’t feel much more rested. So today was a quiet, stay in the apartment kind of day.
I think I need to eat some more protein.
I have class in the morning again.
If you don’t hear from me for a few days, you can safely assume I died.
Or maybe I’m in a coma …… resting.

7 thoughts on “A Piece of My Mind ……

  1. Mary Ellen

    E-Harmony, Christian Mingle, Catholic Match, Ourtime- all a waste of money, and even more a waste of time. Imagine all the good books you could read or naps you could take, or walks you could take, or volunteer work you could do with the time you have wasted online.
    My last two experiences pushed me to the point of quitting…. one three month emailing and chatting nightly with a man who I discovered too late was not widowed, but still married. The other with a man who said he was widowed, but when I asked him to bring his wife’s death certificate to our next meeting…. changed his status online to divorced. REALLY?????

    Yet the Lord works in mysterious ways. As soon as I resolved to not waste another minute online looking for Mr. Right, an old friend popped up at the YMCA parking lot, and after some catching up, she realized she had the perfect man for me! Guess what? I thank the Lord often, and we are taking our time, treating each other respectfully, having fun, and making new memories. God took his time and paraded a bunch of frogs and toads before me, before I realized that was not his plan. As soon as I let Him do the choosing, and learned my lesson, BINGO!

    Mary Ellen

    1. mysecondplana Post author

      Mary Ellen,
      I’m SO happy for you!!! Can’t wait to hear all about him when I come to KW next week!
      You’re right, a lot of time can be wasted on those sites. Thankfully, I don’t spend much time at all on any of them. The most energy I put out is deleting the emails. πŸ™‚
      It helps that I’m not doing this to meet someone. Makes it much more humorous. But even though I’m not looking for a relationship, I find it infuriating that E Harmony doesn’t always practice what it preaches (or advertises). They must be making a mint!!

  2. Jennifer Billings

    Ok thanks for the giggle this morning! I’d date you! Of course you got a response, that’s truthful and hysterical! I will tell you that the day my sister got on to delete her profile because just like you, was sick of the kind of men she was getting responses from, (ok run on sentence, sorry) she met the guy who is now her husband. Most wonderful man by the way, it was his first day on the site, go figure! Love you Janine!!

  3. auntieali1

    Boo for eharmony … I went on it to just kind of get back into the swing of dating after getting out of a bad relationship – I was not looking for anything more than some dates, some confidence. It was ok, but I was over it, and I was about at the end of my committment to the site, and I figured I’d just see it through with the guy I was “communicating” with, have the date and say goodbye to online dating. I gave up dating all together … because I fell in love with that last guy! We just had our sixth anniversary. So who knows … maybe it’ll still work out, or maybe it’ll just be a funny story. You would never have known unless you tried!

  4. Paula Tamburro

    My one eharmony match that actually resulted in a date was with a widower. The date was so horrible and soul crushing that I put on my wedding ring and vowed never to date again. How that jerk who created the questions you answer can claim his algorithm is anymore than some kind of random number generator is beyond me. I think it is the same thought process and theory that if something is hard to join you are more loyal to it. Think boot camp and fraternity hazing. So you waste hours on these stupid questions thinking its worth something.
    On the plus side that date was two years ago and when I was at CWW in San Diego I got a phone call from the guy I had met at my Volvo dealer and we have been dating ever since. Not related to efuckingharmony but hopeful none the less.


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