She’s Here ……

IMG_0893

…… and my heart has grown yet again.

She’s tiny (just shy of 6 pounds), beautiful and perfect.
Her birth was easy and relatively quick.

When I first looked into her eyes I felt such joy …… and such sadness …… that it was hard to breathe.
My heart is full and yet it hurts.
A lot.
God, I miss him.

I didn’t expect it to hurt this much.
Which is what grief does best, I suppose.
It sneaks up on you at the worst times.
And the best ones.

He should be here, falling in love with a little girl all over again.
He should be here. For Daughter #3.
And for Granddaughter #1.
But since he’s not …… I’ll have to give her all of the love we both would’ve.
I think I’m up to the task.

They named her James.
There.
Are.
No.
Words.

Her middle name is Eliana.
This is what my daughter posted:
“She is named after her late grandfather (my dad), whose integrity, generosity, and wisdom we hope she inherits. And her middle name means “God has answered”- she is indeed the long-awaited answer to our prayers.”

She is indeed.

7 thoughts on “She’s Here ……

  1. Lisanne

    Awwwwwww…. congratulations to you!!!! How very, very wonderful. Give mommy a hug for me:)

    Will she be called James or Eliana?

    On Tue, Feb 11, 2020 at 5:44 PM My Second Plan A wrote:

    > mysecondplana posted: “…… and my heart has grown yet again. She’s tiny > (just shy of 6 pounds), beautiful and perfect. Her birth was easy and > relatively quick. When I first looked into her eyes I felt such joy …… > and such sadness …… that it was hard to breathe. My ” >

    Reply
  2. Beverly Vreeland

    How very exciting for you and your family. I have 5 grands and each one is so special. Enjoy every minute you can with this new little life!

    Reply
  3. glenda1203

    Congratulations to you and your family! Bittersweet for sure!
    I too have 2 grandsons awaiting my 1st granddaughter April 1st. I can’t wait!!! She will have my maiden name as her middle name!

    This: “She is named after her late grandfather (my dad), whose integrity, generosity, and wisdom we hope she inherits. And her middle name means “God has answered”- she is indeed the long-awaited answer to our prayers.” She is indeed.

    Reply

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